my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
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