and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
