OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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