if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
