We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize