i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
