Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
