I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
