I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize