Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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