why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Randomize
