I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
