What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
We are all done wearing pants today
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
