Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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