I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
