I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
