i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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