If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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