My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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