But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
