you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
