I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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