At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
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