I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize