We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Randomize
