I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just had sex on a roof
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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