so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
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