last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
