Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize