we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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