why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
