I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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