Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
