We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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