I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
