that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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