chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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