You were right. It hurts to walk today.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
