if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
