Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
He kissed a someone with a penis
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
