Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
