I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize