Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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