Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize