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• (310): View more from California

  kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.

  (1-310): View more from California

  damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics

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• (760): View more from California

  I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys

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• (914): View more from New York

  I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick

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