We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize