I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
