There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize