It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
