He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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